The Love Bug
by Danny'sGhostGirl
Summary: Spongebob's world flips upside down when a new girl moves into the neighborhood; however, his life isn't the only one affected. Patrick isn't too keen on how his best friend's been acting. Girls ruin everything! He can't possibly let this evil new girl rip apart their friendship!
1. Prologue

**DGG: Oh my goodness. I'm actually fairly nervous about posting this. Not to mention that I'm sure that something like this is extremely overdone...But anyway, I decided to post my first official Spongebob story. It popped into my head...many years ago. Actually, I think I started writing it around the time of the show's tenth anniversary. I've had this under my hat for like three years...Wow. **

**DISCLAIMER: I do not own Spongebob; however, I do own a lot of Spongebob merchandise. Probably too much. You might need to stop me...**

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It was a beautiful day in the underwater town of Bikini Bottom. Currently, two sea creatures were frolicking around in the lush, green grass of Jellyfish Fields. A plump, pink starfish wearing bright green shorts with a purple floral design was laughing and running around with a net in order to catch jellyfish. He was accompanied by his square, yellow friend, who was wearing a crisp, white shirt, khaki pants, a red neck tie, white tube socks, and shiny black dress shoes. The two bounded over mossy boulders in an attempt to catch jellyfish.

The starfish, Patrick, was finally close enough to a jellyfish to catch it, but whenever he swiped his net towards it, it dodged his every move. This continued for awhile, causing him to grow steadily angrier.

"Stupid net!" Patrick cried. "It must be broken."

He threw the wooden net through the air and it whizzed past the buzzing jellyfish. Of course, this action agitated the transparent sea creature. Its buzz became louder and angrier, and it zipped toward Patrick like a car down the highway. Spongebob stopped his own fun when he heard the electrifying sting of the jellyfish and his best friend's cries of pain. He rushed to his friend's side as the jellyfish buzzed away nonchalantly.

"Patrick, are you all right?" asked the sponge, his voice filled with concern as he knelt down by his friend's side.

Patrick stood up, ignoring the red welt growing on his pudgy left side, "Yeah. But my net's broken again. I can't catch a jellyfish."

Spongebob also stood up in order to pat his friend on the shoulder, "Don't worry, Pat, maybe you're just having a bad day."

"You never seem to have a bad day," he pouted.

"That's not true. I mean, I haven't caught any jellyfish today."

"You caught five when we got here," Patrick folded his arms across his chest with a huff.

Spongebob blinked.

"Okay…well…I haven't caught as many as I normally do," he smiled, attempting to make the star feel better.

"Maybe I'm just not cut out for catching jellyfish," Patrick suggested, slumping over.

"No, no, that's not true. It's probably just your net. It must be broken!" exclaimed Spongebob. "Remember, buddy, we're the top jellyfishers in the whole ocean! You didn't used to have such bad luck."

"You're right, Spongebob," the star cheered up. "This is why you're my best friend!"

"Anytime, pal."

Spongebob shook his head as Patrick bounded off to try and catch more jellyfish. Sometimes his best friend could be a little gullible. It would appear that since another of Patrick's nets was "broken" they'd have to go out and buy yet another for him; however, they'd been best friends since childhood, and it didn't really bother him as long as his friend was happy.

He stood in the middle of the meadow, reminiscing about their long and everlasting friendship until Patrick called to him.

"Come on, Spongebob, you're missin' out on all the fun!"

Spongebob smiled and bounded back out into the field to catch more jellyfish with his best friend. While the two were busy playing, they failed to notice a moving-van drive passed Jellyfish Fields. Little did they know that this new resident was about to change everything.

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**DGG: So there's the prologue. I hope it was fairly satisfactory for you all. Please review.**

**And if you want to, head on over to my profile and answer my poll! Thanks!**


	2. Fateful Meeting

**DGG: Hello, all. I'd just like to take the time to thank those who took the time to read the prologue. Here's chapter one! Please read and review!**

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It was a normal, busy day in Bikini Bottom, especially at the Krusty Krab. It was the best fast food restaurant under the sea and it was always full of customers. The wooden restaurant was owned by Eugene Krabs – usually just called Mr. Krabs by everyone that knew him. Although he was very successful, he was also very cheap and greedy. His two employees, Squidward Tentacles and Spongebob Squarepants helped keep the business afloat for barely minimum wage. Squidward, a cranky, art-loving octopus clad in a hazel shirt worked at the cash register. Even though he wasn't the cheeriest of people, he took everyone's orders and passed them back to Spongebob in the kitchen.

It was a typical day with nothing was out of the ordinary. At least not until a newcomer stepped inside and walked up to the cash register. Squidward didn't even look up from his art magazine to see who it was before saying in his droll, unhappy voice, "May I take your order?"

Back in the kitchen, Spongebob was whistling a happy tune to himself while flipping some of his world famous Krabby Patties on the grill. Suddenly, Squidward hung an order in the window for Spongebob, and the bright yellow sponge looked at the receipt and quickly assembled the meal.

"Order up, Squidward!" Spongebob announced in his cheery, sing-song voice.

"So go take it to her. She's at table nine," he huffed while turning the page of his magazine.

"Sure thing, Squidward!" the young sponge grabbed the tray and rushed out into the restaurant, keeping his eyes on the tray as he made his way to the table. "Here you go. One kelp shake, coral bits, and one world famous Krabby Patty."

"Thanks," answered the soft, sweet voice of a female.

"You're wel…" the word became lost in Spongebob's throat upon lifting his blue eyes to view the customer. Shock immediately took over his body once he saw the girl sitting before him.

She was a sponge. Other than his family members, Spongebob had never even seen a female sponge in Bikini Bottom before. She had long, flowing red-hair that was pulled back into a pony tail and lovely ocean-blue eyes. She wore a strapless light-pink dress with a pair of black high heels. She was yellow as well, though she was more of a pale yellow in comparison with Spongebob, and her bright, cherry-red lipstick accentuated her kind smile. The sight of this new square sponge kept the fry cook stuttering.

"Wel…wel…wel…wel…wel…"

"Welcome?" she giggled.

"Y-yeah," he placed the order in front of her, shakily.

The two stayed frozen for a few moments, both completely enthralled with the other as they took in each other's appearances. It was an odd sensation. The two stared into each other's eyes with mouths agape in complete fascination with one another while it felt like the world around them had completely stopped existing; however, while the two sponges had become completely oblivious to the outside world, the two of them did not go unnoticed by greedy eyes.

"Spongebob! Spongebob!" called his boss' aggravated voice, causing him to flinch as he was jarred back to reality. "I ain't payin' ya' to stand around! Get back to work!"

"Uh…ay aye, Sir!" Spongebob turned around and saluted Mr. Krabs, then turned back to the female. "Um…I've got to…back kitchen go…" he rambled awkwardly while pointing with his thumbs behind him toward the back.

She giggled once more as he started to return to his position in the kitchen; however, he made a little detour by the cash register first.

"Psst, Squidward," he whispered with his left hand covering his mouth.

His neighbor peered at him from the corner of his large, oval eyes, "What is it now, Spongebob?"

"Do you know who that girl is?" he pointed to table nine.

Squidward put his magazine down long enough to catch a glimpse of her before hastily returning to its pages, "No, I've never seen her before. She must be new here. Now will you please stop bothering me? I'm trying to cultivate myself," he pointed to his magazine.

"All right…" the sponge answered, a little dejected, but before he stepped through the door to the kitchen, he took one last look at the mysterious new girl at table nine.

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For the remainder of the female's time at the Krusty Krab, Spongebob was a nervous wreck. He kept stealing glances from the small, square window to see if she was still eating and spoke aloud to himself while he flipped some more patties on the grill.

"I wonder who she could be. I should've asked for her name! Well, maybe I'll just ask her next time she's here…WAIT! What if she never comes back?" he gasped while dropping his beloved spatula and covering his mouth with both hands in horror. "What if she doesn't like my cooking? Oh no! This is terrible!" Spongebob jumped up to look out the order window to see if she was still eating. He just had to see if she was enjoying her meal. Unfortunately her table was empty!

"Oh no! She's gone!" Spongebob shrieked and slumped back down to the wooden floor with a poignant look on his usually cheery face. That's when he heard the clicking of high heels on the wooden floor on the other side of the wall.

"Excuse me, but could you give my compliments to the chef? It was one of the finest meals I've ever eaten."

"Whatever," answered the cashier in his uncaring tone.

Spongebob instantly brightened and jumped back up to see this new sponge walking away. When she left through the front, glass doors, the fry cook began flying off the walls in excitement.

"She loved my cooking! That definitely means she'll come back! Woohoo!"

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The rest of the work day, Spongebob remained cheery – maybe even more cheery than he usually was. He couldn't explain it, but just knowing that she had loved his food gave him the feeling that he was floating on air. In fact, everything he did for the rest of the day seemed to be light and airy. He would glide gently to tables and deliver their orders, and he mopped the floors with a dreamy, distracted expression on his face; he just couldn't get the new girl off his mind.

Finally it was closing time. Due to Spongebob's overly cheery disposition, he had done everything that needed to be taken care of before the Krusty Krew could go home: mop the floors, wipe down tables, swab out the latrines, clean the windows, and take out the trash. This didn't faze Squidward in the least. He was quite happy to be leaving a little early and was the first one out the door. Mr. Krabs, on the other hand, thought that Spongebob's behavior was rather odd.

"Spongebob, could you step into my office for a moment?" he asked.

"Hm? Sure thing, Mr. K," he followed him into the small room. He sat down in one of the chairs in front of his boss's desk, while Mr. Krabs, himself sat down behind the desk.

"Now, I'm not sayin' that you doin' all this extra work is bad – and don't expect to be paid extra for it – but you seem to be actin' a little strangely," the crab rotated his large red claw around as he spoke.

"I don't know what you're talking about, Mr. Krabs," the sponge shrugged in confusion.

"Come on, Spongebob, I've seen all this before," the crustacean gave a sly smile.

"You have?" the porous male blinked, still slightly bewildered.

"Of course!" he smiled while grasping the edges of his desk. "I can tell by the look on yer face. You feel like gravity can't hold you down. You've been unnaturally quiet, yet extremely content. Your heart probably feels like it's as light as a feather, right, Boy?"

The sponge nodded, a little concern showing on his features.

"I've never felt like this before, Mr. Krabs. Is there something wrong with me?"

The bright red crab clutched his stomach and chuckled whole-heartedly, "No, no. There's nothin' wrong with ya'. I feel the same way every time I'm around money! You look like you've been bitten by the love bug."

"The love bug? Is it dangerous?" the fry cook gulped.

"Only if it interferes with your work," Mr. Krabs answered sternly.

Spongebob gasped in shock, "I don't want that to happen! I love my job!"

"Relax, Boy," the businessman held up his right claw to calm him. "Your love-struck heart seems to be helpin' ya with your job more than it is distractin' ya from it. I don't think we have anything to worry about here. But I'm just wonderin', who's the lucky girl?"

Spongebob blushed, "Well, I actually don't know. I've never seen her before, and I didn't get a chance to ask for her name."

"Well, I'm sure she'll come around again, and when she does, you'd better act quickly."

"Why is that, Sir?" inquired the sponge.

"Because if you don't snatch her up, someone else will."

"Oh," Spongebob nodded. "Okay, Mr. Krabs. Well, I'd better get home. Gary's probably starving."

"Alright, Lad, and bring your love-struck heart back with ya' tomorrow. With you actin' all loopy with love, we'll have this place operating at optimum efficiency, and more efficiency means more money!" Mr. Krabs laughed.

With that, Spongebob bounded happily out of the Krusty Krab, down the street to his pineapple house. After feeding his pet snail, Gary, he headed off to bed where he dreamed of the red-headed sponge he met earlier all night.


	3. The Love Bug

**DGG: Hey, all. So many views/visitors for this story. I hope that means everyone's enjoying it so far! Thanks for the reviewing! Here's chapter two!**

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A few days passed by since Spongebob's encounter with the mysterious new girl. Though those days felt like years to him as he hadn't seen her since that fateful day. His over-cheery heart was growing weary as hundreds of thoughts rushed through his head at every given moment. What if she had been a complete figment of his imagination? Did that momentous day even really happen? Was it all just some freaky realistic dream? Currently, he was lying outside in his front yard, staring blankly up into the flower-filled sky as this batch of thoughts stampeded through his mind.

"Hey, Spongebob," greeted Patrick as he walked across the lawn. "What are you lookin' at?"

"Hm?" Spongebob answered absently. "Nothing."

"You know, you seem to be in a sort of slump," the star sat down beside him. "What seems to be the problem?"

"Well, I met a girl the other day, and I can't stop thinking about her. I didn't really talk to her and I don't know if I'll ever see her again. And Mr. Krabs told me that I was bitten by the love bug," Spongebob explained.

"The love bug!?" Patrick exclaimed. "Spongebob, that's horrible!"

"Huh?" he sat up. "But Mr. Krabs said…"

"Mr. Krabs? You're going to believe your boss over your best friend? Trust me, Spongebob; this love bug is bad news."

"What do you mean?" the sponge asked worriedly.

"Okay, I know a guy who knows a guy that was bitten by the love bug once."

"What happened to him?"

"Nobody knows. The only thing that's known for certain is that he was never seen again."

"But…why?" the sponge frowned.

"Well, some say it was because the love bug devoured him whole!" Patrick threw his arms into the air for emphasis.

Spongebob gave an uncomfortable wince at the thought of a giant bug swallowing him in one gulp.

The pink male put his arms down, "Others say it's because he, himself was turned into a love bug for the love-bug army to infect more unsuspecting victims!"

The sponge gasped in horror.

"And worse, yet, they say he got married!"

Spongebob raised an eyebrow at this, "But…what's so wrong with that? I mean, my parents are married."

"Yeah, but when you get married, you lose all freedom," Patrick held up his finger and waggled it sternly in his friend's face. "You can't be friends with all your old friends anymore unless they're married too, and worst of all, your wife nags you constantly. 'Do this, do that, don't leave the seat up.' It's torture, Spongebob! Complete torture. Do you want someone telling you every little move you can make for the rest of your life?"

Spongebob's shrill, frightened cry pierced the air as he got on his knees and begged his friend, "Patrick, I don't want any of that stuff to happen! Tell me, is it too late for me? Do I still have a chance?"

"Hmm," Patrick placed his right hand to his chin as he looked his friend up and down, "we may have caught this just in time."

"Well, what do I need to do to cure myself?"

"Don't worry, Spongebob, it's not that difficult. First, you have to burn the clothes you were wearing when you first got your symptoms," explained Patrick.

"Oh no!" Spongebob ran inside to the laundry room, closely followed by his best friend. "I've piled other clothes on top of the ones I got my symptoms in!"

"Better burn 'em all just to be safe," the star spoke matter-of-factly.

"Are you sure?" Spongebob blinked, furrowing his eyebrows in worry.

"Would I steer you wrong?"

"But…these are my clothes…" he motioned toward the pile.

"Do you want to get better or not?" the star placed his hands on his hips haughtily.

The sponge sighed and began reaching for the pile of dirty laundry.

"Spongebob, wait!" the shirtless male held up one of his pudgy hands. "Don't use your bare hands!"

The yellow male pulled his hands back quickly as if a giant clam were about to bite his fingers off.

"I think I have some gloves in the kitchen," Spongebob raced out of the room and returned seconds later with a pair of yellow latex gloves. Next, he proceeded to pick up the pile of clothes and took them to the front room where a small fire was already burning in the fireplace. He gave one last forlorn look at his best friend, who simply nodded his head as if to say "go ahead." Spongebob sighed and tossed his wardrobe into the flames.

"Okay, what's next?" the sponge looked up at his friend.

"Where were you when you first started experiencing symptoms?"

"I was at work. She was sitting at table nine," the square individual reminisced with a dreamy smile on his face.

Patrick slapped him, "Snap out of it, Spongebob! You don't want the love-bug to consume you!"

Spongebob shuddered.

"Well, then we'll have to burn table nine! It's contaminated!"

"I don't think Mr. Krabs'll be very happy about that…" the fry cook frowned while shaking his head.

"Spongebob, it doesn't matter what Mr. Krabs thinks! Does he want his entire restaurant to become a breeding ground for these deadly little bugs? We're doing it to save the Krusty Krab!"

"Well, I wiped it down yesterday with disinfectant spray like I'm supposed to at the end of each day. Do we still have to burn it?"

"Hmm, your spray probably slowed it down, but it can't hold it back forever. Quickly, we have to get to the Krusty Krab!"

The starfish dashed out the front door with Spongebob hot on his trail. They raced down the street to the wooden restaurant as fast as they could, standing outside the glass doors.

"I see it! It doesn't look contaminated though," noted Spongebob.

"You're right. We must have gotten here just in time," Patrick burst through the double doors, causing the customers and Squidward to look up at the commotion.

"Spongebob, can't you spend your day off at home where you're away from me?" Squidward asked, clearly annoyed.

"Everybody, we have a crisis!" Patrick exclaimed. "The love-bug's infected the Krusty Krab!"

Everyone stared blankly at him, not saying a word.

"Spongebob, which table is number nine?" he looked over at his friend.

"That one," he pointed to a window seat, which was currently unoccupied.

"Hurry, Spongebob, we have to get rid of it!"

The two rushed over to the table and began attempting to lift it from the floor.

"Spongebob, Patrick, what do you two think you're doing?" asked Squidward as he brought a tentacle up to his temple.

"This table's been infected, Squidward, we have to get rid of it," explained Spongebob's strained voice.

"Infected?" Squidward raised an eyebrow. "Infected with what?'

"Were you not listening?" Patrick dropped his end of the table and sprinted toward Squidward. "The love-bug infected it!"

"What are you blabbering about? There's no such thing as a love bug."

"A non-believer, huh? They're all non-believers in the beginning until they get infected too. You'll thank us, Squidward, trust me."

Patrick strolled back over to help his friend pick up the table again. As the two weaklings struggled ceaselessly, Squidward sighed and walked over to his employer's office. Moments later, Mr. Krabs emerged.

"Spongebob, Patrick, what the barnacle are you doing?" he demanded, his claws on his hips.

"Saving the Krusty Krab," answered the fry cook.

The old crab trudged across the restaurant, grabbed the two boys with his bright red claws, and dragged them back to his office.

"Mr. Krabs, you don't understand!" exclaimed Spongebob. "We have to save the Krusty Krab from the love bug."

"What? That's one of the most ridiculous things I've ever heard come out of your mouth, boy, and I've heard some pretty odd things from you," the businessman raised an eyebrow.

"But the love bug is set to take over any minute!" cried Patrick, grabbing hold of the crustacean's light blue, short-sleeved work shirt.

He pried the starfish off him and looked them both in the eyes, "Look. I don't know where you get your information, but the love bug is not dangerous. I told you the other day, Spongebob, that it's harmless."

"That's what they all say!" bellowed Patrick.

"Of course it is, because it's the truth," Mr. Krabs shoved the star into a chair. "The 'love bug' is just another saying for having a crush on somebody. It means that you like someone."

"So does that mean I have a crush on you?" asked Spongebob, cocking his head innocently.

"What?" the crab blinked.

"Well, I like you, so does that mean I have a crush on you?"

"No, no, boy," Mr. Krabs waved his claws in front of him. "A crush is when you get that funny feelin' in your stomach and your heart's all a flutter."

"Oh," the two friends said in unison.

"There is no actual 'love bug,'" Mr. Krabs continued. "And if there was, I don't think it would be harmful to anything. So stop tryin' to destroy me restaurant and go play."

The boys nodded and quickly left the building. Once they were outside, Spongebob turned to Patrick.

"See? We don't have anything to worry about, after all," he smiled.

"But what about that guy who was never seen again?" Patrick frowned.

"Well…maybe he wasn't bitten by the love bug," Spongebob shrugged. "Maybe something else just happened to him."

"But I was told he was bitten by that bug, got a girlfriend, then got married, and was never seen again! I don't want that to happen to us!" Patrick whined.

"Don't worry about it, Pat. Nothing can tear us apart. We're best friends forever, remember?" Spongebob held up his ring engraved with the letters "BFF" on it.

Patrick smiled.

"Yeah!"

"So we have nothing to worry about. C'mon, let's go back to my house. We can watch movies with Gary."

"Okay," Patrick cried.

With that, the two headed back down the street to Spongebob's house with Patrick feeling very reassured. What was he thinking? He and Spongebob had been best friends since before they could even crawl! Nothing but nothing was going to ever tear them apart! They'd remain friends forever, just how they should be…


	4. Luck Favors the not so Prepared

**DGG: Hello, lovely readers. I would just like to take the time to thank everyone for the nice reviews again. They brighten up my day! So here's the next chapter! Enjoy.**

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Spongebob looked at the receipt: a Krabby Patty, coral bits, and a kelp shake. A large smile crept its way onto his face; it was the same order that girl wanted a few days before! He couldn't contain himself. He jumped up and peeped through the window to see who was standing at the cash register, but to his dismay it wasn't his crush. Dejected, he jumped back down, completed the order, and sent it to the front.

"Where could she be?" Spongebob wondered aloud. "She has to come back. She liked the food here, so that has to mean she'll be back."

"Spongebob," called a voice. "Spongebob! SPONGEBOB!"

He snapped out of his thoughts and looked up to see Squidward's angry face peering at him through the order window. "Spongebob, stop daydreaming and start fixing these orders!"

"Uh…sure thing, Squidward," he quickly shuffled through all the new receipts and assembled the orders as quickly as he possibly could; however, his mind didn't stay focused for long. Sure enough he starting slacking off again and was soon just standing with his head in the clouds as he kept contemplating why the other sponge hadn't returned yet. This delay, of course, did not go unnoticed by the cashier or by the people waiting for their food.

"Spongebob," Squidward stormed into the kitchen, placing his tentacles firmly on his hips, "what's gotten into you? Do you not hear those angry customers out there? They want their orders!"

"What? Oh, sorry, Squidward. Here they are," he held out a tray of food for him to take.

"Spongebob, all of this is burnt to a crisp!" cried the cephalopod as he pushed the tray away. "These people didn't come here to eat charcoal!"

"That's it! I'm tired of waiting around," yelled an angry male customer from the front.

"Yeah, let's go somewhere else where they actually care about the customers," agreed a female fish.

As the crowd of fish began to disperse toward the doors, the two employees heard the sound of their employer's door slamming open against the wall.

"Wait!" he cried. "Don't go!"

"Well, if you want us to stay, then maybe you should invest in some better help!" retorted yet another fish.

"No! Come back! They must be havin' an off day!" the greedy crab begged, but pretty soon the whole restaurant was clear of any customers. "No!"

The two blinked as they heard Mr. Krabs' angry voice, "Spongebob, Squidward, what's the meanin' of this?" The crustacean burst into the kitchen.

"Spongebob is shirking in his duties back here," Squidward informed him while folding his arms across his chest in a huff.

"Are these patties burnt?" Mr. Krabs examined the food on the tray with an air of surprise in his voice. "This isn't like you, Spongebob."

"Sorry, Sir," he answered sheepishly while looking down. "I just don't know what's wrong with me. I can't seem to focus today."

"Well, you'd better start focusin' and stop frustratin' me customers!" the crab spoke sternly as he pointed a red claw at the sponge.

"I'm sorry. It won't happen again, Sir."

"It better not. Time is money y'know. Now, both of yeh', get back to work."

The Krusty Krew returned to their posts and waited for new customers to arrive. All though Spongebob was still in a slump, he was able to focus more on his job than before. There were certainly no complaints from anymore customers that came in after that; however, Spongebob knew that his cooking wasn't up to par tonight, which only served to upset him even more. It was certainly an off day for him. No matter what he just couldn't stop thinking about her. The seconds crept by like a snail racing through molasses. The fry cook just wanted to go home and sleep, so when it was finally quitting time for the day, Spongebob, for the first time in his life, couldn't have been more relieved.

"I'll see you boys, Monday," said Mr. Krabs.

Squidward grunted as he stepped unenthusiastically out the door.

"See you Monday, Mr. Krabs," Spongebob spoke as he also headed for the door.

"Wait a moment, Boy," the sponge winced at his boss' words, slowly stopping and turning to his right in order to face him. "I want you to know that if you slip up again, the consequences won't be pleasant," warned the greedy crab.

"Y-yes, Sir," the fry cook gulped.

"I understand we all have our off days, but tonight was ridiculous. Do you understand me?"

"Yes, Sir."

"All right. Now go home and clear your head, and when Monday comes around, I expect you to be in tip-top shape. Understand?"

"Yes, Sir."

"Good. I'll see you later then."

"Bye, Mr. Krabs," the sponge frowned.

Spongebob felt worse than he had throughout the rest of the day. Now his job was at stake! He sauntered down the road in a depressed slump. He couldn't believe it. He sighed as he walked, his head bowed so he was staring at the ground as he walked. Suddenly he reached a fork in the road and decided to take a detour through Jellyfish Fields in hopes that the buzz of the jellyfish would help calm his nerves.

As he walked, his mood didn't really improve. In fact, the buzzing of the jellyfish appeared to aggravate his thoughts, throwing them into an angry frenzy. It was all that girl's fault. If she had never come into the Krusty Krab in the first place, then none of this would have happened! Yeah! Maybe it was a good thing she hadn't shown herself since that day! Perhaps Patrick had been right all along. The love bug seemed to be nothing but trouble. Well, that was that. He'd just have to push that girl from his mind. He was practically on the verge of losing his dream job because she was all he could think about, so it only seemed logical that he shoved her out of his mind. And if she ever did show up again, he'd just ignore her. Well…he'd fix her her order, but that was all he'd do. Yeah! He wouldn't think of that girl ever again. This seemed like a good idea until he heard a soft giggle from somewhere to his left. He stopped, his heart skipping a few beats. He recognized that laugh…

"I didn't think anyone else would be out here," she spoke.

Spongebob blinked and turned around. Lo and behold, it was the female sponge he'd waited on earlier that week! He stared at her numbly while she stood up and walked casually toward him. It was her! It was really her! Suddenly seeing her made all his previous stress melt away, and his angry thoughts toward her were a thing of the past. All that mattered was that she was here.

"You're that fry cook from the Krusty Krab. Spongebob, is it?" she held out her hand to shake his.

'_She remembered my name!'_ his heart fluttered.

Spongebob unconsciously extended his own arm and grabbed her hand, unable to speak. She giggled and blushed at the mesmerized look on the boy's face.

"My name is Suzie, by the way," she smiled shyly.

Spongebob just stood there like an ice sculpture. There were so many things he wanted to say to her, so why wouldn't his mouth move?

"It's okay," she pried her hand out of his death grip. "I'm not going to go anywhere. So what brings you out here?"

"I…I…I…home. Walking I home was," he spit out.

Suzie giggled.

'_Great going, Spongebob. You can't even put a simple sentence together!'_

"Do you come here often?" she asked.

He nodded.

"I found this place while I was exploring the city on my first day here. I find the buzz of a jellyfish to be quite soothing."

"M-me…too," he choked out. "S-so…what b-brings you to B-Bikini Bottom?"

"Nothing special," she shrugged. "I just needed to get away from my hometown. I'd been there all my life and I needed to get out on my own."

"W-well…you'll love it here," Spongebob smiled nervously. "Bikini Bottom is a g-great place to live. I've lived here all my life and I can't think of a better place to live."

"Yes, it seems quite peaceful here," she smiled while looking around, taking in the serene surroundings.

"Well…um… would you like someone to show you around the town?" the male wrung his hands nervously. "I'd be happy to be your guide. Tomorrow's Sunday, so the Krusty Krab is closed. I have the whole day free."

"That would be lovely," she smiled sweetly. "Shall I meet you here around lunch time?"

"Sure, I'll be right here!" Spongebob cried happily, bursting out into a giant goofy grin.

"Great," Suzie giggled again before turning around and folding up the purple blanket she had been sitting on. "I'll see you tomorrow then."

"See you then!" Spongebob waved as she left, his smile growing.

'_Suzie,'_ he crooned to himself. _'I'll be here bright and early.'_


	5. And So it Begins

**DGG: Hey again, lovely readers and reviewers. I'm glad you all seem to be enjoying the story thus far. Sorry for the semi-late update. I know I don't really have a set time that I've been updating, but it's been nearly a week, and I usually update this one twice a week. Oh well. Here's the next chapter. Enjoy!**

* * *

The next morning, Spongebob woke up bright and early. Excitement coursed through his veins like adrenaline at the prospect of meeting with Suzie later. He spent extra time in the shower, ironed his clothes for the day, brushed his teeth, and polished his shoes – anything he could think of in order to look his best for her.

"Perfect," Spongebob smiled into the bathroom mirror before turning around. "What do you think, Gary?"

Spongebob's beloved pet snail, who had been resting in the doorway of the bathroom, lazily looked up at his owner.

"Meow," he answered unenthusiastically.

"Why, yes, I do look rather dashing, don't I?" the sponge agreed arrogantly as he turned back around in order to admire his reflection once more.

Gary rolled his large, round eyes, then turned around and left as Spongebob stood there and continued to examine his crisp, fresh appearance in the mirror. He was quite proud of his nice, cleaned up exterior and would have kept staring at his reflection had he not heard someone knocking on his metallic front door.

"Huh? I wonder who that could be?" he wondered as he trudged downstairs to the front room.

"Hey, Spongebob," Patrick greeted while holding up his jellyfishing net when the sponge opened the door, "ready for our day of jellyfishing?"

"Jellyfishing?" Spongebob blinked, then slapped a hand to his head. "Oh, no, I completely forgot."

"Forgot? How could you forget? We do this every Sunday," the starfish raised an eyebrow while frowning at his friend while lowering his net.

"Well, do you remember that girl I said I met at the Krusty Krab?" a small smile crept onto the yellow male's face.

"The one with the love bug?"

"Yeah, I met her again last night and I promised I'd show her around town since she's new here. Sorry, Pat, I guess we'll have to reschedule," the sponge frowned.

"Oh, no, that's fine," Patrick slumped and turned around. "I'll just go home, I guess. I'll just sit around with nothing to do since my best friend forgot about me. But don't worry about me; I'll be fine."

As the starfish strolled down Spongebob's cobblestone walk way, his net dragging across the ground, the fry cook couldn't help but feel guilty. They did spend every day off Spongebob had together. How could he have just forgotten him like an old, discarded piece of trash? The sponge sighed.

"Wait! Why don't you come with me, Pat?" he suggested.

"Really?" the starfish stopped at the end of the walk way and turned around.

"Well, sure," Spongebob smiled. "I'm sure she doesn't know many people here yet. I could introduce you two."

"Great!" Patrick zipped back up to this friend. "Plus, if she's the one that unleashed that love bug, maybe she's dangerous."

Spongebob furrowed his eyebrows at that last statement.

"Patrick, Mr. Krabs said that the love bug isn't really real…"

"Yeah, but…" he began to protest.

"But what?"

"But…um…well…you…you don't know her!" Patrick finally shouted, trying to think of something. "You don't know how she really is! Maybe if she turns out to be insane, you'll need someone to help you sneak away?" Patrick added hopefully.

"Well…" Spongebob rubbed his chin pensively. "I'm not sure about that, but…you're still welcome to come along."

"Where are we going?"

"I'm meeting her in Jellyfish Fields," the dreamy smile returned to Spongebob's face. "Hurry up I don't want to keep her waiting!"

Spongebob rushed down the street toward the grassy plain with Patrick hot on his trail. On the way, the two were mostly silent, which was very peculiar, especially for them. Everyone knew when Spongebob and Patrick were approaching by the sound of their laughter, but this walk was much different. Patrick watched his friend as they grew steadily closer to one of their favorite hangout spots. He couldn't help but notice the strange, dreamy look on his square friend's face. It was a little like the look on Patrick's face whenever he was about to devour some food. But what could Spongebob be thinking about? Certainly not that girl. That was preposterous! Girls ruined everything! And Spongebob said he'd never let anything come between them! Then again, Spongebob had already forgotten about him because of her. How could he forget that Sunday was their jellyfishing day? It just didn't add up. Patrick was so lost in his own thoughts that he didn't even realize they had come to a stop in front of another individual.

"Sorry to keep you waiting," Spongebob blurted out an apology. "My friend Patrick wanted to come along too."

"Don't worry, I haven't been here that long," she smiled at him before turning to the starfish. "Hello, Patrick. My name is Suzie, Suzie Roundbottom."

Patrick eyed her suspiciously, "'Roundbottom'? You're not round."

She laughed, "No, but my parents are."

"Really? Mine too!" exclaimed Spongebob, causing her to turn back toward him.

The two sponges stood staring into each other's eyes for a few moments after that. Patrick eyed the two. He wasn't too sure what was going on, but he knew he didn't like it.

"Spongebob, are you okay?" he finally asked after the silence became too unbearable.

"Hm? Yeah," he answered distantly, not once taking his blue eyes off the female's eyes.

"Maybe we should go now," Patrick suggested. He had a bad feeling about this. He needed to get Spongebob away from this girl pronto!

"Great idea, Patrick!" Spongebob smiled. "C'mon, Suzie, I have so much to show you!"

"Okay," she smiled.

The two headed toward the road without any regard for Patrick at all. The starfish blinked in surprise. He certainly wasn't expecting that to happen. With a grunt, he followed silently behind them. Soon enough, they were within the city with Spongebob pointing out all sorts of sights. Suzie paid close attention to every syllable he uttered and giggled every so often. The longer he watched the two, the angrier he seemed to become. Not only was his best friend ignoring him, but he was afraid that Spongebob was on the verge of possibly falling in love with this girl! But that couldn't be! Spongebob would never choose some dumb girl over him! After all, Patrick gave up his crush on Mindy the mermaid so he could still hang out and play with Spongebob, and he knew that Spongebob wouldn't let some girl come between them either. He walked along with a feeling of triumph inside him until he realized Spongebob was no longer giving Suzie a tour of the town. They were just walking along and talking.

"So how long have you worked at the Krusty Krab?" she asked.

"A few years now," he answered. "It's been my life-long passion to work as a fry cook."

"Well, you're excellent at it."

"Thanks. I was wondering why you hadn't been back in though," Spongebob frowned.

"My parents only let me and my siblings eat out only once or twice a month. They said it was unhealthy otherwise," she explained.

"Really?" he blinked. "Lots of people eat at the Krusty Krab every day."

"Too much fast food isn't good for you though. However, I'd never had food like yours before. It was very tempting to come back in."

Spongebob flushed a light shade of red, which caused the female to giggle once again. Patrick was growing steadily more furious with each word they exchanged. And her soft, cheery giggle was just getting on his nerves. His faith that his best friend wouldn't fall for this girl was growing thinner with each passing second. He couldn't let Spongebob fall prey to the evils of marriage. What kind of best friend would he be if he just sat back and watched Spongebob suffer? Plus, what would happen to him if Spongebob got married? They wouldn't be able to hang out anymore! He'd be all alone! There was no way he could let that happen! He'd waited long enough. That love bug really was devouring Spongebob, and he needed to get his friend away from her!

"Um, Spongebob, I think we should be going now," Patrick piped up, but the two love struck sponges didn't seem to hear him as they continued to walk. "Spongebob, hello? We have to be leaving now."

The two still made no indication of hearing his deep voice. The star huffed. If they wouldn't pay attention to him, then he would make them! Patrick stormed in between them, finally breaking their concentration on one another, causing them to stop walking.

"Hey, what did you do that for?" demanded Spongebob, putting his hands on his hips.

"Because it's time for us to go back home now," Patrick folded his arms across his chest.

"Why?" Spongebob raised an eyebrow.

The starfish hummed as he tried to think of a reason. Finally, one came to him.

"Because I'll bet Gary is lonely without you."

"Gary spends time home alone all the time while I'm at work or out with you. Today isn't any different," the fry cook shook his head while raising an eyebrow.

"Gary?" Suzie inquired.

"He's my pet snail," Spongebob's annoyed demeanor changed back to a happy one.

"Oh, I just adore animals!" she squealed while clapping her hands together.

"Yeah," continued Patrick, "but I think he's sick."

"What?" asked Spongebob, turning his attention back to his friend in surprise.

"Yeah, he didn't sound so good when we left!"

"But…did you even see Gary before we left?"

"Fine, don't believe me. But don't come crying to me when your snail is meowing with a stomach ache later tonight because you didn't go home and check on him," the starfish folded his arms across his bare chest dramatically and turned up his nose.

"Patrick, I think you're overreacting…" the male sponge tapped his right foot on the ground.

"No, no, he's right, Spongebob. I need to get home, myself anyways," Suzie placed a hand on his shoulder.

"Already?" Spongebob whined. "Well, would you like me to walk you home?"

"That would be lovely," she smiled.

The female sponge led the boys down a lonely street to a small apartment complex. The outside walls were made of the same metal all the other homes in Bikini Bottom were made of, and it was a dark slate grey. It was about three stories tall and in the shape of a perfect square. Suzie stopped beside the outside entrance to the building and looked at Spongebob.

"It was lovely spending time with you today," she smiled, a slight hint of red on her cheeks.

"Yeah, I had fun too," smiled Spongebob. "Hey, if you're not busy tomorrow, you should come into the Krusty Krab around lunch time when I take my break. We could eat lunch together."

"I'd like that very much. I'll see you tomorrow then," she waved.

"Okay! Bye, Suzie!"

"Bye, Spongebob. Bye, Patrick. It was nice meeting you."

Patrick merely grumbled as she stepped inside and made her way to her own apartment. Once she was out of sight, the two males headed home. Thank goodness Suzie was gone. Now things could start to get back to normal! At least, that's what Patrick had hoped, but all the way home Spongebob was still in a sing-song, dreamy-like state. Silence continued between the two until they made it to Spongebob's house when Patrick finally spoke up.

"Spongebob, can I ask you a question?"

"Sure, Pat," he answered distantly.

"Do you think you're starting to like that girl?" the star frowned.

"Suzie? I don't know. I've never felt this way before. But so far it's been the best feeling in the world," the sponge crooned.

"You…you wouldn't want it to become something more, would you?" Patrick asked, worried while wringing his hands together.

"I don't know. But I can't stop thinking of her. And all I know is is that I don't think I want to stop thinking about her. Well, I'll see you later, Patrick," he waved suddenly.

The starfish blinked in surprise as he watched his best friend skip merrily up to his door. Did Spongebob really just say that? He couldn't have meant it, could he? He had to have been kidding. If he started dating Suzie, then he'd have no time to play with him anymore. Well, he just couldn't let that happen. Spongebob just didn't know what he was getting into. His head just wasn't in the right place! It was probably infested with those love bugs! He'd put a stop to this budding romance before it was too late! Spongebob would thank him for it later. After all, they were best friends, and it was his duty as a best friend to help Spongebob when he was in need. Whether Spongebob knew he was in need or not.


	6. Attempting to Thwart the Enemy

**DGG: Hm. I didn't really update as soon as I originally intended to do. I was originally shooting for Wednesday, but other stuff got in the way. I edited this chapter last night, so I could post it then, but it was like 1:30 in the morning and I needed to get up in six hours, so I couldn't sit there and do one last read-through before posting it. So...yeah. It's here now though! Woo! Haha. I'm really lame...**

**Here's the next chapter! Enjoy!**

* * *

The next day at work Spongebob was back to being extra cheery; he just couldn't wait to see Suzie again! He worked steadily, yet he always kept an eye on the clock in order to count down the seconds until her arrival. But above all, he was extremely happy. He would proclaim it to anyone who would listen, and everyone else was happy for him. Squidward was happy because that meant Spongebob was too preoccupied to bother him for the time being. Mr. Krabs was so happy with Spongebob's work performance that he gave his fry cook a whole ten minutes to eat his lunch with Suzie before he had to get back to work. Yes, everyone was ecstatic about the newcomer in Spongebob's life. Everyone except for Patrick, that is.

The starfish was still fuming about his best friend's behavior from the previous day. Spongebob liked this girl. He really, really liked this girl! And yesterday Spongebob had already shown signs of forgetting about his best friend! He never thought that was even remotely possible before yesterday! The two of them always hung out whenever Spongebob wasn't at work or at school! How could she have worked her evil love-related magic so quickly on his best friend? Patrick wasn't sure of many things in life; however, he did know one thing: if he didn't do something, then this new sponge was going to ruin everything!

He recalled that Spongebob had invited her to eat lunch with him later, and he planned to help his best friend out of this situation. Suzie was the cause of all this nonsense, and he had to keep them apart! The chubby star sauntered to Bikini Bottom's most famous fast food joint and peered through the giant glass window. Immediately, Patrick huffed as he placed a frown on his face; the she-devil was there.

* * *

"Wow, you sound like you come from a really close family," Spongebob said while taking a break from eating his Krabby Patty.

"Yeah, that's why it was really hard to move so far away from them, but I figured it would be for the best in the long run," explained Suzie before she took another bite of the salad she brought in.

"Hey, Spongebob! Long time, no see," Patrick spoke happily as he suddenly popped up between the two, his back facing the female.

"Um…Patrick, what are you doing?" questioned Spongebob.

"Oh, nothing," he shrugged. "I was just a little hungry and thought I'd stop by the Krusty Krab to get some lunch."

Spongebob blinked.

"Well…I'm on break right now…"

"You're just going to let me starve? You've changed, Spongebob. You've changed," Patrick shook his head while folding his arms across his chest melodramatically.

Now both sponges blinked, neither truly sure of what to do.

"Patrick, I'm a little busy right now," the fry cook motioned to the female behind his friend, "I have a few more minutes here, and then I'll make you whatever you want."

"But I'm hungry now!" the starfish pouted.

"Patrick, I said I was on break," Spongebob reiterated through clenched teeth, once again motioning to Suzie.

"But I'm a _paying_ customer," Patrick smirked.

"Payin' customer?" Mr. Krabs suddenly burst out of his office like he had super-sonic hearing. "Spongebob, you're causin' me to lose money!"

"But…my lunch break's not over yet…" he frowned.

"Are you disobeyin' a direct order?" the crab huffed.

"No, Sir," Spongebob sighed in defeat before turning back to look at Suzie. "Sorry I couldn't stay longer, Suzie."

"That's okay," she smiled as she packed up her things. "Maybe we could talk later when you get off work."

The male sponge instantly brightened, "Really?"

"Sure," she smiled. "You can come by my apartment later. My apartment number is ten; I'm on the top floor."

"Okay, I'll see you later!" he cried as bounded happily back into the kitchen.

"It was nice seeing you again, Patrick," Suzie waved at him before she turned to leave.

"Uh huh," he spoke flatly, not even bothering to turn and look at her. But as soon as she left, he slammed his fist down onto the table in frustration. "Tartar sauce!"

That evil she-sponge thwarted his efforts! She was good at this game. Well, if Spongebob was going to her apartment later tonight, then so was he. After that, he waited around outside the Krusty Krab until closing time, and when Spongebob skipped merrily out the front doors, Patrick followed stealthily behind him.

"Look at him," Patrick noted while his best friend led him to the apartment complex. "That girl already has him wrapped around her little finger! She's going to just rip him away from his old life!" Patrick suddenly put a scowl on his face at the thought. "Well, not if I have anything to say about it!"

* * *

"Wow, you really do have a big family," noted Spongebob as he looked at all the pictures on the mantel of her parents, siblings, cousins, aunts, uncles, and a few nieces and nephews. "It must have been _really_ hard for you to leave them."

"Very," she stepped up beside him to stare longingly at the photos. "They were all pretty devastated too, but they understood that I needed to get out and see the world on my own."

"So do you have a job here?" Spongebob changed the subject.

"I work in a clothing store just down the street," she smiled, her long ponytail swinging behind her as she turned her head to the right to look at him.

"Is that where you got that pretty dress?"

She giggled, "No, actually I made it myself."

"Wow. Really? It looks great! What else can you make?"

"Oh, about anything: scarves, shirts, skirts, socks, mittens, hats. You name it, I can probably make it," Suzie winked.

"Do you think you can make me something?"

"Sure, what would you like?"

Spongebob placed a hand to his chin for a moment to ponder; however, before he could answer, a loud rapping came from the front door.

"Hm. I wonder who that could be?" the red-head wondered aloud as she opened the door. "Patrick?" she questioned, blinking in surprise at Spongebob's friend.

"Patrick?" Spongebob repeated as he stepped toward the doorway. "What are you doing here…?"

"You know what I'm doing here," answered Patrick matter-of-factly.

"What? No, I don't," he shook his head, still quite bewildered.

"Spongebob," Patrick held up his "BFF" ring.

The male sponge was still confused.

"Yeah? What…what about it?"

"Spongebob Squarepants, we are best friends, are we not?"

"Well yeah, Patrick, but…"

"And as a best friend, it is a part of your duty to help me when I am in need."

"So what exactly is it that you need, Pat?" the male sponge shrugged, still perplexed by the starfish's presence.

"Oh…I…um…" the pink male stuttered. He hadn't thought this far ahead yet. He had to say something, but what could he say? Panic overtook him as he said the first thing that came to his mind. "I need help waxing my eyebrows!" he suddenly shouted.

Both sponges gave the star a deadpan stare.

"Um…" Spongebob finally spoke up. "Well, couldn't that wait? I mean, I'm kinda in the middle of something here since _someone_ cost me the rest of my lunch break."

"No, Spongebob. It really can't wait. We have to go do it right now," he urged.

"Why do you even want to?" the fry cook raised an eyebrow.

"Because maybe I'd like to feel pretty," Patrick scoffed while placing his hands on his hips. "So come on."

"Patrick," Spongebob complained. "I'm hanging out with Suzie right now."

"Come on, Spongebob, you just met her! She'll be here tomorrow!" Patrick rolled his eyes. "I'm your best friend, and I need your help now."

"Getting your eyebrows waxed isn't a life or death situation, Pat," Spongebob spoke sternly. "I'm sorry, but I'm busy right now. We'll do it later…I guess."

Patrick crossed his arms in a huff.

"You just don't wanna leave because of that stupid love bug thing Mr. Krabs was talking about!"

"Love bug?" Suzie finally spoke up, raising an eyebrow as she turned to look back at the male sponge.

"Don't act like you don't know what it is!" Patrick cried.

"What's he talking about, Spongebob?" she asked, furrowing her eyebrows now.

"Well," Spongebob started, a slight blush taking over his face. He suddenly found that he couldn't look her in the eye, so he diverted his gaze toward the ground where he was nervously tracing his right foot in circles, "ever since I saw you for the first time at the Krusty Krab, my boss said I was bitten by the love bug…"

"Really?" a slight blush came to her own cheeks.

"Yeah," he laughed nervously, stealing a nervous glance toward her, his hands clasped behind his back sheepishly.

Silence fell upon the three individuals in the room as everyone took in what just happened. Patrick looked back and forth between the two sponges with a slight feeling of triumph. She wasn't talking. In fact, she seemed a little shocked. Maybe now that she was aware that Spongebob knew she had released her love bugs, she wouldn't be interested in him anymore! Then everything could finally go back to normal! However, Patrick's happiness was short-lived when Suzie suddenly smiled.

"Oh, Spongebob," she spoke.

And that's when the unthinkable happened. Upon hearing her breathless words, Spongebob's nerves seemed to steady. He stood up straighter, no longer fidgeting as a large, dreamy smile crept onto his face. The two then stared longingly into each other's eyes and before long they intertwined their fingers with one another's. Little hearts seemed to just pop up all around them as they stood as though they were frozen in time. This wasn't going at all how Patrick had hoped it would!

"Spongebob, snap out of it!" cried Patrick in a panic.

But the sponges were in a world of their own. Nothing could touch them. Nothing could penetrate the love bubble that seemed to surround them.

"Spongebob!" Patrick waved his arms frantically. "Spongebob!"

"I haven't eaten dinner yet," Spongebob suddenly spoke up apparently not hearing the cries of the other male. "Would you like to go out somewhere?"

"I'd love to!" Suzie batted her eyelashes.

The two sea sponges, with hands interlocked, turned and walked out the door as if Patrick was invisible. The star's jaw just dropped. What just happened? He came here to save his and Spongebob's friendship, yet he somehow just made the situation worse! Maybe this was too much for him to handle on his own. He had to save Spongebob from the evils of women before it was too late! He rushed out of the apartment and ran down the street to his friend Sandy Cheek's underwater tree dome.

"Sandy! Sandy!" Patrick beat on the plastic bubble. He didn't have a bowl to fill with water to put on his head, so he couldn't go inside the completely oxygenated area.

"Patrick?" Sandy, a common brown, furry land squirrel wearing a purple bikini-like outfit stepped up. "Well what are you doin' here?"

"Sandy, it's terrible! Something terrible's happened to Spongebob!" he cried.

"What?" she gasped suddenly on edge. "What do you mean? Is he hurt? Was he kidnapped? Is he missin'? What's the problem?"

"No, it's worse than any of those things!"

"What could be worse than that?" she frowned, worry etched on her furry features.

"He was bitten by a love bug!"

Sandy raised an eyebrow at the sheer ridiculousness of his statement.

"Say what?" she spoke flatly.

"A love bug," he repeated. "Spongebob was bitten by it and now he's spending all his time with some…some…girl! It's horrible!"

"That's it? Patrick, I don't really see the problem," Sandy scratched her head.

"How can you not? Aren't you a scientist? Don't you study these kinds of things?" he frowned.

Sandy chuckled.

"Patrick, calm down. Spongebob havin' a li'l crush on somebody is nothin' to fret about," she shrugged with a smile.

"It's not just a little crush!" Patrick pounded both fists on the dome for emphasis. "He really, really, really likes her! They went out to eat together right now! This is terrible!"

"What's so terrible about it?" the southern squirrel raised an eyebrow.

"We won't be able to be BFFs anymore!" the star stuck out his lower lip.

"That's ridiculous, Patrick. You and Spongebob are tighter than bark on a tree. Just calm down. Now if you're done actin' like a fool, I have some experiments I'd like to check on."

"Sandy, no! Come back! We have to save Spongebob from the evils of girls!" Patrick cried as Sandy began to walk away; however, she stopped once he finished his sentence.

"What'd you just say?" she turned around, practically snarling.

"I…uh…" Patrick stuttered nervously, shrinking in fear.

"You'd better get out of here, Patrick, unless you wanna be squashed flatter than a flapjack underneath a steamroller!"

The star instantly turned around and ran screaming from the tree dome. Patrick was horrified, for more than one reason. But the main reason was that Sandy wasn't going to help him keep Spongebob away from Suzie! How could she not understand what happened when someone got into a relationship? She was the smartest person he knew, and yet this predicament with Spongebob wasn't bothering her at all! Well, maybe Sandy didn't realize the seriousness of the situation, but Squidward surely would.

The starfish huffed away to his street, where Squidward's island head home stood in between his and Spongebob's homes. Once he got there, he started beating on the wooden door.

"Squidward! Squidward! You have to help!"

Reluctantly, the door opened, "What do you want, Patrick? I thought we established that we wouldn't bother me after the sun goes down."

"I know, but this is important!" Patrick exclaimed, still in a frenzy. "Spongebob's in trouble! He needs our help."

"Oh, really?" the octopus answered sarcastically. "Well, in that case…"

Suddenly, he slammed the door in the star's face.

"Good idea, Squidward, we may need some supplies. I'll wait here while you get 'em."

"You do that," said Squidward's muffled voice from behind the door.

Patrick waited and waited but still his annoyed neighbor never returned. A couple hours passed, and he was growing weary, but he suddenly perked up upon hearing Spongebob's merry voice singing. He turned to his right and saw that his friend seemed to be floating on air as he skipped happily up his walk way. The sponge didn't even notice his friend as he opened his front door and stepped inside.

Patrick placed his hands on his head. This couldn't be happening. Spongebob was falling deeper and deeper into Suzie's evil clutches. Well, if no one else would help him, he would just have to try and do it himself. Tomorrow, he would put a stop to this once and for all!


	7. Finding Authority

**DGG: Hey, everyone. Sorry about the semi-late update. I'm um...feeling rather overwhelmed about life and stuff at the moment. It's one of those down moments I get into, and I'm hoping it'll pass soon; however, at the moment I still feel like there's a boulder just sitting on my chest. Sigh. Oh well. You don't want to hear about my problems. I'm sure you'd rather hear about Patrick's, so here is the next chapter.**

* * *

The next morning Patrick woke up bright and early to go to Spongebob's house. Well, it was bright and early for him, at least. Nine in the morning wasn't usually his wake-up time. Regardless, the pudgy, pink star threw off his bed sheets, jumped outside, and strolled across the lawn to get to his best friend's pineapple before furiously knocking on the doorway. A few moments passed, so he knocked again. A few more went by without anyone answering, so he pounded the doorway even harder. He waited, but there was still no answer.

"Spongebob!" Patrick called finally. "Open up! I have to talk to you! Spongebob! Spongebob! Spongebob! Spongebob!"

"Patrick, do you mind?" Squidward shouted angrily from his upstairs window.

The star turned his gaze upward to his left.

"I'm tryin' to get Spongebob's attention!" he turned back to Spongebob's door and began hammering away again with his fists. "SPONGEBOB! SPONGEBOB!"

"Patrick! PATRICK," the octopus had to shout over the racket for the starfish to hear him. "He's not here! He left this morning!"

"Left? Where'd he go?" the pink male turned toward Squidward once more.

"I don't know. All I know is he went to go pick up that poor girl he keeps blabbering about at work. And the only reason I know that is because he was singing about it as he left, and it woke me up," the cephalopod folded his arms across his chest with a huff.

"He's with Suzie? Now?" Patrick's oval eyes bulged.

"Apparently," Squidward shrugged.

"This is terrible, Squidward! We have to go rescue him!"

"Rescue _him_? I think it's the girl who needs rescued from him rather than the other way around. How anyone could actually stand Spongebob for more than three milliseconds is beyond me."

"This is serious, Squidward! We have to find him! He's supposed to be spending the day with me not her!"

"Yeah?" Squidward raised and eyebrow. "Well, tell that to Spongebob's annoying singing. Now if you don't mind, I'd like to get on with practicing my clarinet."

"But how will I find him?"

"How should I know, Patrick? Just go play or something," the aggravated neighbor finally closed his window and walked away.

The starfish sighed. He couldn't understand it. Where could Spongebob have gone? And why would he go without him and go with Suzie instead? This was bad. This was very bad. It was all happening so quickly! He was losing his best friend to some new girl, and he could do nothing to stop it! They spent all of Spongebob's free days together! They had since they were kids. But now…now he was spending them with someone else! This couldn't be happening!

Suddenly an idea struck the male. Ideas didn't come too often to him, so he had to grab this one by the horns. Spongebob wasn't listening to him, right? Well, he'd just have to find someone else that Spongebob did listen to! That's how he would stop this! If someone else told him to stop spending all his time with that dumb girl, then things would go right back to normal! But who did Spongebob listen to? Who did he take orders from? Suddenly it hit him as he turned and raced toward the Krusty Krab.

* * *

"Five, ten, fifteen, twenty," Mr. Krabs counted his money out loud at the register.

The store hadn't opened yet. It was still way too early. But even though the Krusty Krab didn't open until about eleven, the greedy crab loved coming into work early specifically to count his money again. Being there alone with nothing but the sound of his cash crinkling against one another always put him in a good mood, and it gave him a chance to think.

'_I wonder why we don't have a breakfast menu? Hm. Breakfast Patties. That could work. And I could charge ten dollars for 'em! Why didn't I think of this sooner?_ The businessman mused to himself as he closed the register drawer.

The crab was just about to walk back to his office to take care of some paperwork, when suddenly Patrick ran up to the doors and started pounding on the glass.

"Patrick? What are you doin' here?" Mr. Krabs stepped over let him in.

"Hey, where are all the customers?" Patrick whined as he scanned the empty restaurant.

"They ain't here yet, Boy. We aren't open yet. Why are you here?" the crustacean raised an eyebrow.

"I need to find someone who gives Spongebob orders all the time! And he listens to all the customers here! Tarter sauce," the starfish snapped his fingers in defeat.

Mr. Krabs stood there for a moment, looking the chubby male up and down. He rushed all the way down to the Krusty Krab to find _customers_ to give orders to Spongebob? The businessman rubbed the back of his head as he attempted to figure out Patrick's line of thinking.

"I'm going to regret this, but why are you looking for someone who gives Spongebob orders?"

"Because! I have to find someone who'll make him listen! If they tell him to stop seeing that other sponge, then…"

"Is that what this is about? Spongebob's happy with her. Why would you want that?" Mr. Krabs frowned.

"Well, I'm not happy! Don't you see what she's doing?" the pink male threw his arms dramatically into the air.

"Um…I must not be…" the business owner scratched his chin.

"She's destroying mine and Spongebob's friendship!" he threw his arms down to his sides.

"That's crazy-talk! She's doin' nothin' of the sort, Patrick," Mr. Krabs placed his claws on his hips.

"No, it's true," Patrick assured him. "He forgot about me today! Whenever he's not at school or work, we play together! But he's with her instead!"

Mr. Krabs gave a heartfelt chuckle.

"He's just tryin' to get to know her better. He likes her! Your friendship's not in jeopardy."

"But, Mr. Krabs, girls always tear old friendships apart! Why do you think I don't have a girlfriend?"

The crustacean eyed the starfish and his unkempt appearance.

"Um…"

"It's because I know that friendship is more important! Who needs girls when you're best friends?"

"Patrick, now you're just bein' silly. Fallin' in love is a way o' life. You can't stop it from happenin'! And no customer is goin' to order him to stop seein' Suzie, nor am I, or Squidward, or anyone else. Understand?" the crab scolded.

"You need to understand! This is serious! She's taking him away!" cried Patrick desperately.

"Patrick, I think you're overreacting. Just go home and take a few deep breaths. Everything will be fine."

"It won't be fine if she stays here!" Patrick cried as he turned and ran down the street.

"You can't stop it, Boy!" Mr. Krabs called after him from the doorway. The crab shook his head. This whole ordeal was really upsetting the starfish. Patrick certainly had a misconstrued perception about relationships. Hopefully Spongebob and Patrick would be able to settle this soon.

* * *

"Sandy! SANDY!" Patrick cried when he spotted the suit the squirrel wore so she could breathe underwater.

"Huh? Patrick? Hey, why aren't you at the carnival?" she asked. "I figured you'd be there with Spongebob."

"Sandy, you have to help me!" he cried.

"What's goin' on now?"

"That Suzie is succeeding in taking Spongebob away!" he slammed his right fist into the palm of his left hand.

"What?" Sandy raised an astonished brow. "Are you still goin' on about this? Patrick…"

"I need to find someone that can tell Spongebob what to do!"

"What?" she asked flatly.

"I need to find someone that he always listens to to tell him that he can't see her anymore! It's the only way to save him!" the star exclaimed.

"Patrick, have more screws come loose from your brain?" the squirrel placed her hands on her hips.

"Come on, Sandy! She's gonna take him away! That's what girls do!"

"Patrick Star," the female spoke threw gritted teeth, "if you say one more derogatory thing about girls I'm gonna…"

"Please, Sandy!" he fell down on his knees and begged.

She sighed, shaking her head.

"Patrick, it just sounds like you're jealous!"

"Sandy, who do you know that could boss Spongebob around?" he continued.

"Patrick, this is crazy. No one is goin' to tell him to quit seein' her!"

"Sure they will! If they understand the evils…"

"Patrick, _no one _is going to do that. His parents wouldn't even tell him to stop!"

"His parents?" Patrick blinked. "HIS PARENTS! Sandy, you're a genius!" he jumped up rushed down the road, leaving the squirrel in the dust.

Sandy shook her head as she watched the pink star's form grow smaller and smaller in the distance. She realized what he was doing. She realized why he was doing it. This was going to be interesting.


	8. The Party

**DGG: Oh goodness. An EXTREMELY late update. Sorry, everyone. I was extremely stressed over school things, and my recital was last Monday, so I was focusing on that. I wanted to post this chapter sooner, but I ended up re-writing it like...a billion times. At least that's what it felt like. I think I fixed it up. So enjoy, and sorry again about not updating sooner.**

* * *

The following day at work, Spongebob stood by the cash register with his boss and co-worker, happily speaking about his time with Suzie at the carnival the previous day.

"It sounds like you two had a great time. So when are we gonna' meet her, Lad?" asked Mr. Krabs with a hearty smile on his face.

"Well, you've seen her before, Mr. Krabs," Spongebob pointed out, a wide, goofy grin still on his face.

"Oh, sure. We've _seen_ her, but you've never formally introduced us to her."

"So let me get this straight," spoke Squidward from his post. "This poor, deranged girl still actually wants to spend time with you?" the sponge nodded. "Well, at least you won't be bothering me."

"Aw, you're always welcome to join us, Squidward," Spongebob hugged his neighbor.

"Personal space, Spongebob," the cephalopod reminded.

"Whoops. Sorry," he quickly let go and backed off.

"Well, anyway, you'd better get to work, Boy, or I'll have ya' workin' through lunch," ordered Mr. Krabs.

"Ay aye, Sir," Spongebob saluted like a sailor.

He began to head back into the kitchen to fry up more Krabby Patties; however the doors being thrown open caused everyone to stop and stare.

"What the barnacle…?" Mr. Krabs trailed off.

"Patrick?" asked Spongebob. "What are you doing?"

"I've come here to bring you," Patrick revealed a red wagon behind him with two individuals sitting in it, "your parents."

"Mom, Dad?" Spongebob walked over to them to help the round sponges out of the tiny contraption. "Patrick, why did you bring my parents here?"

"I believe I have found the only individuals capable of stopping this nonsense for good!" Patrick smiled triumphantly.

"What nonsense is he talking about, Dear?" the raven-haired female sponge asked as she smoothed out her purple dress.

"Um…I don't really know, Mom," the fry cook admitted.

"He burst in the door claiming that you were in some sort of trouble, then shoved us in a wagon, and brought us here," claimed the mustachioed Mr. Squarepants as he rubbed his sore back.

"We were so worried," the mother frowned.

"Well, everything's fine here," Spongebob shrugged. "I don't know what Patrick's…"

"I have some troubling news about your son," Patrick interrupted, causing everyone to stare at him. "Spongebob is failing in his best friend duties, and he's breaking the number one rule!"

"And what might that be? Not being a moron?" Squidward laughed to himself, no one else hearing his joke.

"Spongebob is too busy thinking about some girl, rather than hanging out with me!" the starfish cried.

Everyone blinked at the seriousness of the statement.

"Is it true, Son? Is there a girl on your mind?" asked the patriarch sponge.

"Um…well…I…I guess I may have met someone," Spongebob laughed nervously, his cheeks turning pink in hue.

The two elder sponges remained silent, taking in this new information. The stunned looks on their faces actually brought a small smile to Patrick's face. Clearly they knew this was a big deal. They would definitely get Spongebob to see that this girl would mean nothing but trouble!

"Go on," Patrick prodded. "Let him have it!"

"Spongebob, why didn't you tell us?" asked his mother.

"Well, she…she just got here. I mean, we just met," the square sponge rubbed the back of his neck nervously.

"That boy has been googly-eyed for this girl since he first saw her here," smiled Mr. Krabs as he joined everyone at the door.

"Oh, my baby has a girlfriend!" the female sponge embraced her son happily.

"Well…I don't know if I'd say that exactly," smiled Spongebob as he returned her hug.

"Don't let him fool ya'. The boy is head over heels for her," Mr. Krabs continued.

"Spongebob, you should have told us!" his mother gave him a kiss on the forehead.

"Well, I was waiting for the right time," he admitted with a smile.

"Well, who is she? What's her name? When do we get to meet her?"

"Now, Dear, calm down," her husband came to stand beside her. "I'm sure he'll tell us all about her when he has the time."

"Yeah, I really have to get back to work," the young sponge smiled gratefully at his father. "But…um…you can go back to my house and wait there until I get off work if you want."

"Oh, this is wonderful!" the raven-haired sponge cried. "When can we meet her?"

Patrick's jaw dropped. They…approved?

"Well, she was coming over tonight for dinner. I guess you can meet her then."

The starfish's eyes bulged at his friend. He was actually going to let her in his house?

"Now hang on a second," the crab jumped in. "The two o' ya did just start datin'. It might be a little bit too soon for her to be meetin' yer parents."

"But my mom and dad are going to be at my house anyway," Spongebob frowned. "I'm sure she won't mind."

"We can turn it into a little dinner party!" the excited woman cried. "And you can invite a few more of your friends!"

"That's a great idea, Mom!" the fry cook beamed at the suggestion.

"Might take some o' the pressure off meetin' with your parents too," agreed Mr. Krabs.

"Then it's all set! Your father and I will run to the store to get some food for tonight!"

"You don't have to do that," the young sponge shook his head.

"Don't you worry, Dear. We'll take care of everything. We'll see you later tonight!"

"All right, then. Bye. I'll see you later," he waved as his parents left.

"All right. Back to work with ya'," Mr. Krabs placed his claws on his hips. "We've had more than enough chit-chat, and you've got a lot of work to do before tonight."

"Right away, Mr. Krabs!"

"Mr. Krabs, this is awful!" Patrick cried once Spongebob was back in the kitchen. "His parents weren't supposed to be happy about this! What's wrong with them?"

The crustacean sighed, letting his claws fall to his sides.

"Patrick, you're over-reactin'. There's nothin' wrong with Spongebob meetin' a girl. It makes him happy," the businessman frowned.

"But he spent the whole day with her yesterday! I know he did!" the star complained.

"I believe the boy was on a date yesterday."

"So! He didn't even invite me along!" Patrick motioned toward himself.

"Three's a bit of a crowd on a date, Lad," the crab raised an eyebrow.

"It doesn't matter!" tears started to form in the starfish's eyes. "He didn't even tell me about it!"

"Patrick…" the older male extended a claw to rest on the boy's shoulder.

"No!" Patrick ripped out of his reach. "She's got him wrapped around her little finger and he's only known her for a few days! And he's barely spent any time with me since she got here! Don't you see what she's doing? She's trying to tear me and Spongebob apart!"

"Now yer just bein' silly," Mr. Krabs placed his claws on his hips again. "If this is botherin' ya, then maybe you should…"

"No! I know what I'm talking about!" the pink male interrupted. "I know a guy who knows a guy that went through this very thing! Girls are evil, Mr. Krabs. And I have to save Spongebob before her love bugs completely brainwash him!"

The star suddenly turned and ran out the glass doors before the businessman could say anything else.

"Oh boy," Mr. Krabs rubbed the back of his head with his giant, red pincer. "I hope he doesn't do anything he's goin' to regret."

* * *

That night, Spongebob hurried home to help his parents with the rest of the preparations for the party that evening. During his lunch break, he had called Suzie to inform her about the slight change of plans for the evening, then proceeded to call a few more people to invite them to the party as well. The sponge was excited to say the least as he skipped and hummed around his home, setting the table and tidying up a bit.

At around seven, everyone started to arrive. Suzie had been first, of course, and immediately Spongebob's mother engaged her in merry conversation. After a while, Sandy arrived, followed by Mr. Krabs and his daughter Pearl. Larry the lobster showed up as well as Spongebob's driving instructor, Mrs. Puff. Even Squidward decided to show up, mostly out of curiosity as to why this girl was so fixated on his annoying neighbor. About a half hour passed when everyone decided to sit down to the delicious meal that Mrs. Squarepants prepared, but as everyone sat down, Spongebob couldn't help but notice one empty seat.

"That's weird," he spoke. "Has anyone seen Patrick?"

Everyone immediately quieted down as they observed the empty seat as well.

"Now that ya mention it, I don't think he's here," said Sandy while she looked around.

"That's odd. Patrick never passes up an opportunity where there's food involved. I wonder if he forgot."

"Patrick forget food? He's more likely to grow a brain than ever do that," Squidward huffed while crossing his arms. "He probably just fell asleep or something."

"I'll go get him real quick. Hang on, everyone."

"Hurry back, Spongebob," Suzie smiled.

"I will!" he grinned.

The sponge quickly walked from the kitchen, through the living room, and out the door. He had just closed the metal door when he turned to his right and ran right into his friend.

"Patrick, there you are," Spongebob smiled. "We were just…"

"Spongebob, I need to talk to you," the starfish fumed, catching the sponge off-guard with his anger.

"About what?" he cocked his head to the side.

"We're best friends, are we not?"

"Yeah, of course. Why?"

"Did I or did I not warn you about the dangers of dating?" Patrick waggled his finger.

"What?" the sponge furrowed his eyebrows.

"The love bug, Spongebob!" Patrick exclaimed. "Did I or didn't I warn you about it?"

"I…guess so, but Patrick…"

"No, Spongebob!" he cut the sponge off, holding up a hand to silence his friend. "You may not realize it, but that girl is bad! She's done nothing but come between our friendship!"

"What? Patrick, what are you talking about?" the shorter male gawked.

"Spongebob, ever since that girl came into the picture, you've completely forgotten about me!" Patrick pouted, his anger replaced by sadness.

"What?" the sponge blinked in confusion.

"I mean that you've been in this weird dreamy-like state ever since she came around!" Patrick's hostility suddenly returned. "You forgot about us hanging out on that Sunday – something we _always _do! And when I tagged along you guys acted like I wasn't even there! And don't even get me started about yesterday!"

"Yesterday?"

"Yeah! You were hangin' out with her yesterday too! But whenever you have a day off, we're supposed to hang out! You didn't even think of inviting me along, did you?" the starfish folded his arms across his bare chest.

"Patrick, I was on a date yesterday," Spongebob pointed out, clearly flustered by his friend's rantings. "Besides we don't _always_ do things together on my days off. Sometimes you're off doing something, and sometimes I'm hanging out with Sandy."

"That's different!"

"How is that different, Pat?" the sponge placed his hands on his hips.

The starfish paused for a moment as he attempted to formulate an answer.

"Um…uh...because!" he finally answered.

"Because why?" the shorter male tapped his foot.

"Because…because this is different! You have feelings for this girl!" the pink male pointed poked Spongebob in the chest authoritatively.

"Wha…? Is this really what this is about?" the sponge raised an eyebrow as he pushed Patrick's hand away.

"Yes, it is, Spongebob Squarepants! I told you girls are nothing but trouble! And I was right! She's tearing apart our friendship!"

"No, she isn't!" the sponge furrowed his eyebrows.

"Of course she is! That's what all girls do!" the pudgy male threw his arms in the air. "It's like they scout out people who have best friends just so they can come in and ruin their friendship! You haven't been paying any sort of attention to me since she came along!"

"Maybe that's because you've been acting a little crazy lately!" Spongebob suddenly snapped at him.

"What?" Patrick blinked, taken aback by his friend's outburst. "I have not! Name one time!"

"You came barging into her house the other day demanding that I wax your eyebrows! And…now is another time too!"

"I am insulted, Spongebob!"

"You're insulted?" the yellow male gawked. "Patrick, you came over here and started spurting all sorts of jealousy-prone…"

"I am not jealous!" the starfish interrupted angrily. "I'm trying to save you and our friendship! She's been planting those pesky little love bugs in your head to make you think about her and only her! The more time you spend with her the more she infects you with them! Soon you'll be married and no one will ever see you again!"

Spongebob shook his head incredulously.

"Patrick, how do you come up with this stuff?"

"I told you that I know a guy who knows a guy!"

"Patrick, this has gone too far!"

"I'm telling you, Spongebob, this is what girls do. You might not be able to see it now, but that's what's happening! Girls waltz in, tear you away from your old friends, and won't let you see them unless they're married or dating someone too! You'll have no time for me if she stays!" the starfish shook his friend by the shoulders.

"Suzie isn't like that, Patrick! I mean, if she was would everyone be over here for dinner right now?" Spongebob motioned toward the pineapple after shrugging out of his friend's grasp.

"It's just a cover!" he blurted out.

"What?" the fry cook cried.

"Spongebob, I'm trying to save you!" the starfish urged, seeing that his words weren't working.

"I don't need saving, Patrick!"

"If you were truly my best friend you would believe me!"

Spongebob's jaw dropped at this statement.

"Are you serious?"

"I've never been more serious! I think you have a decision to make!" Patrick frowned while once again folding his arms across his chest.

"A decision? A decision for what?"

"It's either her or me!" Patrick pointed toward the pineapple, then to himself.

"Patrick!"

"You've gotta choose, Spongebob! Society doesn't let you have both, so who's it gonna be? Your best friend or some girl you just met?"

"Patrick, stop!"

"She's coming between us, Spongebob!"

"Because you're forcing her to!"

"No! She's forcing herself to with her extreme evil!"

"Don't talk about her like that!" cried Spongebob.

"Choose, Spongebob!" the star demanded.

"I can't do that, Pat…" his face fell, his anger subsiding.

"I see," the starfish frowned, tears glossing over his large eyes.

"Pat," Spongebob frowned, taking a step forward.

"She'll ruin everything if she stays, Spongebob! She just will! And if you can't see that, then maybe we shouldn't be friends anymore!" the starfish turned around and ran back to his rock.

"Patrick, wait!" Spongebob extended a hand.

The sponge sighed. He'd never seen Patrick so upset before. He kept staring off toward his friend's home, the only thing breaking him from this trance being the sound of the front door opening.

"Lad," Mr. Krabs spoke.

"Were we that loud?" Spongebob winced.

"Aye," he nodded.

"Spongebob," Suzie stepped outside.

He gave her a small smile.

"That boy is plum crazy," Sandy stepped outside as well, shaking her head.

"He has a lot of misconceptions," agreed Mr. Krabs, planting a claw on his chin. "I think it would do him a lot of good if they were straightened out."

"I think we may need to straighten some things out too," Suzie frowned as she placed a hand on Spongebob's shoulder.

The male sponge nodded as he led Suzie back inside in order to find a private room for the two of them to talk.

"You see?" Squidward frowned up at Larry. "What did I tell you? I knew a dinner party at Spongebob's would only end in disaster."


	9. Smoothing Things Out

**DGG: And here it is, folks. The last chapter. Unless you've been looking at my profile, this may be a bit sudden. I would have mentioned it in the last chapter...but I forgot, to be honest. And when I remembered (which was obviously after I posted it), I thought that I wasn't sure if this would be the last chapter or not, because I could have kept the story going, I suppose, but for whatever reason I feel like this is a sufficient ending to this one. So here it is. Enjoy, readers!**

* * *

"Patrick," Spongebob knocked on the giant brown rock his best friend lived under. "Patrick, come on. Open up. I have to talk to you."

"I don't have anything to say to you, Spongebob Squarepants!" Patrick cried from under the rock, his voice thick with tears.

"Please? It's important," the sponge frowned.

Silence.

"Please, Pat. We're best friends!"

More silence.

"Patrick…"

"Fine. Come in," the starfish huffed.

Under the rock, Patrick was sitting in his armchair made completely out of sand where he hastily tried wiping away the last of his tears. When he heard his rock lift and a tiny thud on the ground somewhere behind him, signaling that his friend had landed on his feet, he turned around only to find Spongebob helping in a second individual.

"I never said she could come in!" Patrick bellowed.

"Well, this talk involves all of us," Spongebob explained, his face uncharacteristically sad for him.

"I still don't want her here! She'll just infect my home with her stupid little love bugs too!" the starfish turned back around in his chair and pouted.

Spongebob turned to his left and frowned apologetically at the female, who only nodded in understanding.

"Patrick, I just think we have to straighten some things up," the male sponge stepped forward to stand next to his friend.

"Like what?" Patrick grumbled. "That you'd rather listen to some dumb girl and get your brain taken over with love bugs than listen to your best friend?"

"Lad, I already told ya' that 'love bugs' aren't real," spoke the voice of Mr. Krabs as he too hopped down into Patrick's house.

"Mr. Krabs? What are you doing here?" the starfish blinked in bewilderment.

"We all heard yer fight outside. You seem to need a little guidance, so I came here to help out," the crustacean explained.

"And so have I!" called out the southern voice of Sandy Cheeks as she joined the group.

"Patrick, we understand that you're not takin' too well to Spongebob wantin' to go out with Suzie," began Mr. Krabs.

"Because she's evil! She's trying to take Spongebob away from all of us!" the star interrupted.

"From _all_ of us? Or just you, Boy?"

"All of us!" Patrick cried while jumping out of his seat. "Married people don't hang out with unmarried people! That's the rules!"

"Patrick, that's not how it works at all!" Sandy raised an eyebrow as she stepped forward. "Where did you hear somethin' like that?"

"I heard it from a guy who knows a guy."

"Patrick, let me tell ya' somethin'," Mr. Krabs walked over, placing his claw on the star's left shoulder. "Whatever you heard from this guy who knows a guy wasn't true. I was married once, and I still got to see all my old pals who weren't."

"Yeah," agreed Sandy. "My folks had some unmarried friends, and they'd come over all the time to visit."

"Plus it's too soon to speak about marriage for those two. They just met! They have crushes on each other. There's no weddin' bells yet."

"You…you were allowed to hang out with unmarried people?" Patrick eyed the older man skeptically.

"O' course! Why couldn't I?"

"Patrick, gettin' a wife or a girlfriend doesn't mean puttin' a shackle on. Spongebob is still free to go out and see and hang out with whoever he wants. Suzie isn't going to change that," Sandy frowned.

"But…Spongebob only thinks about her! She's controlling his mind with those evil bugs!" the star whined.

"Patrick, trust me," the squirrel spoke calmly. "Tellin' someone that they've been bitten by the love bug is just an expression. It's pretty much the same as saying they've been hit with Cupid's arrow…"

"Oh, great! Now there's someone throwing arrows?" the pudgy male grumbled while folding his arms across his chest.

"No, Patrick! There's no bugs, there's no one shootin' any arrows! It just means that they're fallin' for each other! They like each other!"

"No! They're not allowed! Everything would be different! She won't let Spongebob go out alone anymore! Anywhere he goes, she'll have to go too. She won't let him spend time with me anymore!"

Spongebob and Suzie exchanged dejected glances in the background, both feeling sorry for making Patrick feel this way.

"Lad," Mr. Krabs continued, "it's true that couples enjoy spendin' time together, but they aren't together all the time! Each individual in any relationship needs some personal space too. Being in a relationship doesn't mean they're confined in a box with only each other. They can still hang out with all their old friends too."

"But he's been ignoring me. All he's done is hang out with her!" complained Patrick while pointing in the sponges' general direction.

"That's because their relationship is new and budding," smiled Sandy. "They've been wantin' to find out all sorts of things about each other. So maybe he has been seein' her a lot, but that's what happens when you have a crush on someone."

"Yeah," agreed the business owner. "Remember when you went sorta loopy for that mermaid?"

"But…but I…she…" Patrick stuttered. "I knew what it would mean for Spongebob if I had gone out with her!" protested Patrick.

"Patrick, she's a princess. You're not exactly royalty. The two of you never would have gone out anyway," Sandy shook her head.

"Don't say that! What Mindy and I had was special!" the pudgy male threw his arms down to his sides.

"I think we're gettin' a little off-topic here," Mr. Krabs interrupted the growing fight. "But do you understand, Patrick? Your mind was preoccupied with thoughts of you an' her, right?"

"I guess," Patrick looked away.

"Well, that's what's goin' on with Spongebob," the crab smiled. "He's just been thinkin' of Suzie. That doesn't mean he's forgotten about ya'. Trust me, it's how I feel about money! Now she's always on my mind, but I haven't forgotten about the rest of ya'! I love me money, and she loves me! But I still have time for other things every now and again!"

"Patrick," Suzie finally spoke up, causing everyone to turn and stare as she walked toward the star. "I'm sorry if you feel like I'm trying to take Spongebob from you. He told me you two have been best friends since you were babies, and I can understand how this would be a big change for not just you but for him too. But I'd never come between the two of you. I'd never keep Spongebob from going out and having fun with you. Never."

Patrick looked the girl up and down, narrowing his eyes.

"How do I know you're telling the truth?"

"I've never told a lie in my entire life," Suzie smiled.

"Besides," Spongebob spoke up, while taking his place beside the female sponge, "Suzie and I did some talking after you left, and we decided that we're not going to date."

"What?" both Mr. Krabs and Sandy gasped in surprise.

"You're not?" Patrick perked up.

The fry cook shook his head.

"No. We decided that we'll just be friends for awhile."

"We thought it would be best until you got to know me a little better," Suzie continued.

"So you just want us all to be friends?" asked the star, a little skeptic.

"For now," smiled Spongebob. "The three of us will all spend time together, but don't worry," he added quickly upon seeing Patrick's worried expression. "It'll be like how we hang out with Sandy. We'll all hang out sometimes, and sometimes I'll just be with Suzie, and other times I'll be with you. Especially Sundays, Patrick. Those are our jellyfishing days!"

"Well, I suppose that's one way to ease him into the idea," chuckled Mr. Krabs. "So is everything all settled now? Are you okay with this plan, Boy?"

"I don't know…" Patrick frowned again.

"It'll be okay, Pat," Spongebob smiled. "I promise."

"Yeah. I don't want to come in between yours and Spongebob's friendship. He always gushes about you when we're out together, so I know the two of you are practically like brothers. Spongebob and I can take things slower until you've gotten to know me a little better. Deal?"

Patrick stared at her for a moment, mulling over her words.

"He really talks about me?"

"All the time. You're one of the most important people in his life, and I can tell that just from the way he talks. And he clearly means a lot to you too. You have my word that no matter what happens between Spongebob and me that you will always be his best friend. I absolutely will not come between the two of you. I promise."

Was any of this even possible? Sandy and Mr. Krabs seemed deadest on what they were saying, but it went against everything Patrick had ever heard.

"Your wife really let you hang out with your old friends?" Patrick asked the businessman.

"Aye, Patrick," the red male nodded. "I could still see me old shipmates and pals. And I know that Suzie would still let Spongebob see you. She's willing to put the brakes on hers and Spongebob's relationship for you, Boy. If she's still willin' to give you a chance after the crazy stunts you've pulled as of late, then how could you possibly think she's a bad person?"

"Cuz she's a girl."

"Patrick Star, I'm a girl," Sandy snarled. "Am I a bad person?"

"You're kinda scary right now," he winced.

"That's because yer speakin' poorly about girls. And there are some girls out there who would try to control their boyfriends, but Suzie here ain't one of 'em. Trust me. And if she was, you can be certain that Spongebob wouldn't stand for it. All you have to do is give her a chance, Patrick. You're judgin' her unfairly."

The starfish sighed as he looked back at the two sponges. They clearly had feelings for one another, so would they be able to just remain friends? More importantly, how would they act when the three of them were together?

"Well…" he began reluctantly. "You guys can't be all cutesy and lovey when we're all out together. None of that weird staring at each other or holding hands. And if I see a single love bug…"

"Patrick," Sandy warned.

Suzie giggled, "We'll do our best, Patrick. Friends?" she extended her hand.

Patrick eyed her hand for a moment before finally grasping it and shaking.

"Friends," he spoke slowly. "But I'll be watching you."

"You have nothing to worry about. I assure you."

"Hey, Pat," Spongebob spoke. "I'm sorry about ditching you. I guess I wasn't really thinking. But that won't happen anymore. I promise. Best friends for life?" the male sponge held up his friendship ring.

"Best friends for life," Patrick smiled happily while holding up his own ring.

"So what do you think?" Sandy asked Mr. Krabs as the trio began talking amongst themselves.

"I think Patrick'll come around. It's always just been him and Spongebob, but he'll adjust soon enough," smiled the businessman.

"How about Spongebob? He's puttin' his relationship on hold. How long do you think that'll last? He's definitely crazy about her."

"Aye. And she's crazy about him too. They're both kind and caring, and they both want everyone to be happy. I believe Spongebob will hold off on pursuing Suzie until Patrick is okay with the two of 'em. And if Suzie is willing to wait on behalf of one of Spongebob's friends, then I have no doubt that she'll stick around. She's clearly a very special lady."

"Definitely," Sandy nodded in agreement. "They seem like they're getting' along better already."

"Well, I guess our work here is done," the crab placed his claws on his hips.

"Hopefully. I'm still not convinced that Patrick realizes love bugs aren't real things."

"He will in time. I know things'll be just fine."

Sandy smiled as she turned her full attention back toward the trio, who were all laughing happily about something, Patrick a little reluctantly, but he was still laughing.

"Hey, you three, there's still a dinner party, isn't there?" the squirrel asked. "I know that everyone is starvin', so how about we all head back?"

"Food? Oh boy!" Patrick clapped. "As long as I get to sit by Spongebob."

"We wouldn't have it any other way, Patrick," Suzie smiled.

* * *

A few weeks later, Spongebob and Patrick were running happily through Jellyfish Fields, laughing as they swung their nets about to catch jellyfish. The two ran around for a couple hours before they eventually decided to take a break and walked over to a purple blanket that was laid out flat on the ground.

"Wow. This new net is really doing the trick, Spongebob," Patrick laughed. "I've caught so many jellyfish today!"

"I know! That's great, Patrick!" the sponge smiled.

"Hey, Suzie, are you sure don't want to try? Jellyfishing is fun!" Patrick offered to the female sitting on the blanket.

"No, no," she held up her hands with a smile. "I'm alright with just watching."

"Are you sure? I feel bad with you having nothing to do," Spongebob frowned.

"Who said I didn't have anything to do? I've been having fun watching the two of you. Plus I've been drawing some clothing design ideas. I've had plenty to do."

"You're sure?"

"I'm sure, Spongebob. Don't worry," she smiled. "Are you boys hungry?"

"Am I ever!" cried Patrick.

"Dig in," Suzie held up the picnic basket she'd brought.

"Hurray!" Patrick practically dove at the basket as he ripped open the lid to rummage through the goodies.

Spongebob sat down beside Suzie, slowly lacing his fingers with hers. She blushed as she leaned over and rested her head on his left shoulder.

"Hey!" Patrick cried, causing the two sponges to snap to attention. "Having a girl around is great! She always brings such yummy food and gives us little presents! You should have gotten a girlfriend years ago, Spongebob!"

The two sponges laughed at Patrick's eagerness; however, they also felt like rolling their eyes considering how Patrick was so against Suzie merely a few weeks before. Hanging out and getting to know her did precisely the trick, and soon enough Patrick told his best friend that he needed to snatch Suzie up before someone else did. It was amazing what a little quality time could do.

Patrick was pleased with how things turned out. He learned that he his best friend didn't have to give him up just because a girl walked into the picture. In fact, things were even better now that Suzie was around! She enjoyed many of the same things that he and Spongebob did, and she was incredibly easy to get along with. So maybe he had been wrong about girlfriends, but that didn't mean he wasn't going to keep an eye on them just in case.

* * *

**DGG: And there you have it. Thanks for reading and for all the reviews! Hopefully it was a cute little ending. Or it's lacking...I don't know. But there may or may not be more stories n the future. There's certainly ideas in my head if nothing else. But thanks again for reading!**


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